CLING...

I swear , I was not going to write for at least another few days but then this mind never tends to stop thinking and interpreting. So here goes my next post to all existing  "aashiq (s)" "majnu(s)" and  beautiful "laila(s)". I was going to sleep but then all of a sudden from no where this song started to play in mind

"Kitne Bhi tum karlo sitam, has has k sahenge hum.

 Ye pyar na hoga kum, sanam teri kasam..."

And you know thoughts, they just need an excuse to go wild. Well the song is well defined explanation of the term we management students study in HR, "Escalation of Commitment". Google define this term as - "escalation of commitment or "commitment bias" is a term frequently used in psychology and sociology to refer to a situation in which people can make irrational decisions based upon rational decisions in the past or to justify actions already taken."  As this song said "jitne bhi tum karlo sitam"... i mean "bade besharam kism k insan hai aap ki itne sitam aur julm sehne k bad bhi wahi k wahi hai.. ye pyar nahi huzoor ye bewakoofi hai"

Well to explain to in a more better way here is an example-

There was a girl ( ya so obvious) and there was boy ( ya you know this too) and they fall in love ( wow really!!!) and then after years and years of pains which they gave to each other they finally decided to separate ("break-up" in local language) . But every time they decide to move apart they use to think-

Boy - " Man.. i gave my one- fourth life time to this idiot hoping that one day she will turn into a real "girl" and now if i leave her and go to other with whom i have to begin from starting...its hell!!! better stay with one"

Hindi version for desi people - " sala itna khoon pee liya is lady dracula ne ki ab to lagta hai aur kisi k layak      rha he nahi, aur bhagwan na kare agar nayi wali bhi "super-duper-upar chudail" nikali toh..." :( 

Girl - "Ohh God... Sob Sob Sob.. who else will buy me such expensive gifts..Sob Sob Sob... who will get my recharge done..Sob Sob Sob!!! "

Hindi version - "Subak subak meri shopping... subak subak... mere recharge.... subak subak mere liye ladai... subak subak itni achi naukri k sath itna bewakoof admi... and agar naya wala "dominating hua too.. naa baaba naaa... subak subak"

So these trail of thoughts lead them atlast to "cling" together. No where in this whole process the secretion of adrenalin, dopamine and serotonine takes place which gives rise to increased heart beat ( dil dhak dhak karne lga), drying of mouth, less hunger or sleep( mujhe neend na aye) . In simple language people its NOT LOVE its just "clinging".

No discouragement to people who believe in "true love" concept (well i am too part of that of that lot) but some times it becomes necessary to realize that the person with whom we are "deserve" us or not ( trust me guys this "deserve" word is very lethal use at your own risk). Be with the person who want to be with you not with whom you want to be with... and if you luckily belong to remaining ones then you both might end up wanting each other.

It not only happens in relationships it can be a case with your job, with your friends etc. Few among us are lucky in the sense that in their life some "guardian angels" exist which always now and then make them aware of the pit fall they are moving towards. But for others who are on their own try to find a way out as life without peace of mind is one big s***t.

So I am ending this post with the lines again that are now playing in  my mind and in my you tube also-

"Koi na koi chahiye pyar karne wala( ya wali)...

koi na koi chahiye humpe marne wala( ya wali... conditions apply)

ROFL... :D :D